Her name was Alex. I remembered that much.

The room was slightly dark. Softly lit in amber glow.
Pretty sure everybody was asleep by then.

We were supposed to do something. She was taking off her clothes. Slowly, like any nice girl would.

I did not. I was not even reaching for my belt. I watched.

Her brunette hair was like satin against her bare shoulders.
She looked at me. Wondering. Smiling nervously, I could see her hesitation. Her eyes were like moon lights staring at me. Probably she wanted some assurance.

I moved forward and kissed her lips. Slightly opened, her lips caught mine. The kissing was nice and civilised. Beautiful pair of lips. I have always adored her smile every time we passed each other down the corridors. Kissing them seems triumphant. I can definitely brag to other boys.

My fingers ran slowly against her skin. Flawless. Almost luminous.
Even in the dark.

Would she know that I have been dying to measure her perfections with my bare hands from the first time I laid my eyes on her. But that would be a lie. I would certainly love to touch her, but I never lost sleep over it.

She was getting comfortable. I closed my mouth on her neck, all the way down to her cleavage. Taking each time planting small kisses along the trail. She let my hand ran free caressing along the length of her body.

I was taking my time. She was more responsive than I thought. She wanted to return such gestures onto me. Fumbling with my belt and jeans. Such delight I could crush severely in my hands.

but
all the time I was thinking of purple daffodils.
A shattered world and purple daffodils.

Nice girl in my arms. purple daffodils.
Sweet salty taste on the tip of my tongue. purple daffodils.
I closed my eyes and started to sink my teeth into her lovely skin. purple daffodils.

I stopped.

She opened her eyes. She ran her fingers through my hair. Smiling. Those beautiful lips again.

I got up. And leaned away for a while.
She looked confused. Wondering what was the pause all about. She asked me if I was alright.

There I was staring into her pretty face, I could not stop thinking of purple daffodils. My gaze was empty. Penetrating beyond her pretty face and tantalising body. Beyond the wall behind her. I was searching for something.

Something more.
Something she could not give me.
A shattered world. Searing pieces on the field of purple daffodils.

I spoke softly. Whispered sweet nothings into her ears. I told her it was not her fault. I told her she was beautiful. There was nothing more pleasurable than to consume her being. That given any time in a day, I would gladly make love to her over and over again. To make her feel appreciated and loved.

But such would be a lie.
I just could not see myself giving to her. Possessing her. Wanting her bad enough to crush her with all might.

She will be a forgotten face. She was way too lovely to be taken for granted.
At least not by me.

I kissed her eyes gently. Wishing only good things.
Got out of bed and walked to the door.
She forced herself a smile. and watched me left.
We agreed on bind of friendship. or whatever that means.

I closed the door.
and went on looking for the purple daffodils and a broken heart.